Is dating for 5 years too long
It takes a lot of self-control to not call him up, though!
are happy, and your happiness doesn't mean anything to them.
You slowly begin to resent them, and you build up the guts to finally leave, and when you do, that's the only time they realise that their happiness depended on you being around.
It sucks that a wake up call has to be a break up, but they really are the best for personal development. My girlfriend and I were together for about four years and we split up in January of this year.Even if you think to yourself "it's only twice/year" think about how many that will add up to over the course of 5 - 10 years.If something is a potential issue, make sure you honestly communicate about it. It's a slow, gradual, sometimes subtle change. The last year or so of our relationship we both began to realize that we as individuals were stunted in our personal developments because we were holding on to a relationship that had lost its spark.Eventually one day you sit back and realize WTF, this isn't working out, and hasn't been working out for quite some time... People mature a lot in their 20's and the person you were at 18 is not the person you are at 29. You might think to yourself "well, I wanted to go out after work but I know she'll be unhappy if I do, so I'll go out for one drink and tell her I stayed late." The problem is that there will be another happy hour and all you've done is delayed discussing it.
Once we broke up he made all of the changes I had been begging for years for him to make..it was too late.